Title : Mike's December
Author : Ray
Rated : R
Pairing : C/M
Description : December, a time for celebration and rejoice. But to Mike, it's the other way around. December for him is a time of pain and misery.
Chapter 1 - This is me alone
I look up the faint stars. Looking at them always soothed my soul.
A tear streaked down my face and as quickly as it froze, I brushed it away.
I come upon a dark house. No lights, no decorations, just a dark plain house. I remove the keys from my baggy pants and unlock the door and flickered on the light.
I take off my snow-covered shoes, drop my keys to the side table and started removing my jacket before putting it inside the closet.
There was light that emitted from the living room. It was from the fish tank. I knew I couldn’t take care of a dog or cat alone, so I bought fishes instead.
Work takes up my full schedule now that I’m all alone.
I sigh as I head to the living room.
The break up with Anna was too hard for me to handle. She hated me. I hated her. But in the end I regretted saying what I said to her. Now it’s all over. I felt my eyes starting to sting again. I remove the thought and pressed ’play’ on my blinking answering machine.
*beep*
“Hey Mike!” A worried Brad waited before he continued. “where are you man? I’ve been calling your house all fucking day. You better call me the moment you come back cause if you don’t--” I could see Brad making a joking face. I manage to produce a slight smile.
*beep*
“MIKE!!!” It was yet again Brad’s voice. “ANSWER YOUR FUCKING PHONE!” He waited, probably thinking I was here but didn’t want to answer. “Mike man, you’re worrying me to death” his voice softened.
*beep*
I turn off the answering machine knowing all too well that the rest would be Brad’s.
Brad was like a brother to me. He cared a lot about me and he’s the only one who knows about this whole Anna breaking up thing. He’s the one I tell my secrets to. And likewise for him.
I never really loved Anna; I stayed with her because I needed the comfort. I realized I didn’t love her when she wanted me to fuck her, but I refused. That happened for a number of times. Each ends in a battle of words. Then her suspicions began to rise.
I opened the fridge and took out the milk carton and placed it on the counter. I noticed my shaky hands as I grabbed for the cupboard handle. My hands wouldn’t stay still. It wasn’t even due to the cold.
I removed my hands from the handle and stared at it shaking, seeming to have a life of its own.
The pain surged back to me. It was he. Chester Charles Bennington. He was the pain. I felt tears fall freely down my face. I didn’t want to cry, but they were bottled up all too well inside, they just simply ran out of room.
I dropped to the floor burying my face in my hands as I poured the tears out.
“...Mike” I felt a hand touch my shoulder. As I looked up I saw Brad’s worried figure under the dim light.
He sat down beside me and let me cry on his shoulder as he hugged me.
~*~
I woke up in bed wondering how I managed to get here. I look at my alarm clock beside my bed.
10:34.
All my brain could think about was work, work, and work. I was late. I was 3 hours late.
I headed to my closet in search for clothes. My bedroom door opens just as I was going to pull my pyjamas down.
I look over to see Brads head pop in.
“Brad!” I shrieked. “do you mind, I’m trying to change!”
“Where you going?” He asked curiosity streaked across his face.
“Work! Where do you think I go everyday?” I said. But he clearly does not hear the urgency in my voice.
“Today’s Saturday” he said looking at me. I felt stupid. Really stupid.
“Oh...” was all I managed to get out.
“Mike...” he started as he walked in heading towards to where my standing form was. “...Are you okay?” He asked.
“Yeah...I...I’ll be fine” I said looking at the carpet beneath my feet.
“Okay good, now come downstairs, I made you some food” he said smiling. “come down when you’re ready k?”
I nodded and smiled back at him. He walked towards the door.
“...Brad” I said softly.
“Yeah?” He answers.
“...Thank you” I smile a sad smile.
“No problem Bro” he said heading out and closing the door behind him.
Ever since I cut my wrist, he had every right to worry about me. Unfortunately for me, I cut my wrist across, not towards my elbow. He got there just in time to stop the blood loss.
Now I have a scar. A scar caused by Chester. But he knows nothing about it. Brad promised me that he would never tell any of the guys what I was going through. Especially not Chester.
I made my way downstairs and took a waft of the smell coming from the kitchen where I was heading.
“In here” called Brad from the living room. “I set our plates here so we can watch some TV while we’re eating” he said as I entered the living room.
I saw my food on the glass table between the couch and the TV.
Brad grinned at me, fork in his mouth, as he patted the spot on the carpet where he wanted me to sit and start eating my breakfast.
“What are you watching?” I asked.
“Hamtaro” he said laying down his fork.
I looked at the cartoon. Interesting...but weird I thought.
Brad stared at me. I can feel him staring at me from the corner of my eye.
“What is it Brad?” I asked not returning his gaze. I pick up my fork and pierce a strip of bacon.
“I’m really worried Mike --”
“Well don’t be!” I can feel my voice rise.
“I just don’t want you to go beating yourself up like this Mike!” He said putting his hand on my shoulder. “and over Chester, you know he has a wife, heck he has a fucking kid too!”
“I know!” I yelled. I shrug his hand of my shoulder. I slam the fork on the glass coffee table. “I fucking know Brad! And I know he’ll never feel the same way about me but fuck! I can’t help it when my whole fucking body wants him” I cried. “you have no idea how hard I tried to rid myself of him Brad. I try, I really do.” I cry yet again on the shoulder he offers me.
“...Mikey...” I barely hear him. He rubs my back. It usually always makes me feel better.
I really have tried to get over Chester. At first I thought it was just a crush and I would get over it soon. That changed as we started hanging out a lot more. We did everything together.
That all dropped when Samantha came back into his life. They met while we were hanging out at a club. They use to be high school sweethearts and now that they’ve grown, they decided to give it another shot.
I felt a blade cut my heart when I saw them together. I left them alone to chitchat that one night at the club. I doubt Chester neither cared or noticed I was gone. I cried my way home and to sleep.
That’s when I started to hook up with Anna. Even though I knew that that was going to get me no where. I thought maybe she could get my thoughts off of him. I soon discovered that as I was apart from him, the need and longing only intensified.
Not too long after the Samantha meeting, I get a phone call coming all the way from Japan. My parents. I asked the woman on the other line that was crying where my parents were. She blurted out words that I couldn’t understand. I listened a lot more closely... I knew that was a mistake.
Dead. It repeated in my head over and over again. They left me. I was left alone.
For days I stayed inside the house with Brad. Brad refused to leave me all alone. Brad knows me all to well. We’ve been friends since middle school after all and he knew I couldn’t handle things like these too well. He called my job to tell them that I was going to be sick for quite a long time. I told Anna that I was going to go away for awhile, hanging up on her before she demanded an explanation. And Brad told the other guys some excuses about me.
I couldn’t recall how many days after their death that I tried to kill myself, but failed. I just wanted all the pain to end.
I broke up with Anna soon after. She yelled at me for crying over such stupid things. I yelled back at her. I hated her for what she said. And so we split, that night, I knew I lost someone again. As much as I hated her for it, deep down, it kills me that I lost someone again.
The only possible good thing that came out of this was the money I received from my parents’ death. I’m still living in this same house, all alone, and if I stayed here, the money would slowly decrease.
I had to move out soon, Brad was offering me to stay at his place, but he already has no room for him and Joe in that God forsaken house. But he always goes about his ways to helping me. This is practically a second house for him.
Suddenly, I remembered Brad and Joe were supposed to go on a skiing trip together. Was it today? Mike was offered to go but he refused. So these two planned it.
“...Brad?” I asked softly.
“Yeah?” He answers still rubbing my back.
“Don’t you have to go skiing with Joe?”
“Yeah” he said.
“Isn’t that today?” I asked pulling away from his hug to look at him.
“Yeah” he said again.
“Shouldn’t you be going?” I asked confused.
“Mike... I’m just going to end up worrying about you. And besides I could always go next year” he said smiling.
“But you and Joe have been planning this for months” I said tilting my head to the side. “Please go... I don’t want to have to be the one to ruin your vacation”
“But Mike”
“Brad I’ll be fine” I pouted. “I promise you, I won’t do anything stupid, now go before Joe wakes and realizes you aren‘t there in your room”
He looked at me for a while to see if he could trust me.
“Are you sure?” He asked still not convinced.
“Brad if you don’t go...” I started looking at the wrist that wasn’t cut and played with it with my other hand.
“OK, ok I’ll go” he said standing. I grinned at him. “remember your promise”
“You don’t have to worry about me” I said as we started heading towards the door.
He pulled out his jacket from the closet and put on his boots.
“...remember your promise” he repeated kissing my cheek.
I gave him a nod as he opened the door. A rush of cold wind entered. He waved goodbye and headed out.
I decided I would fix the dishes in the living room later as I headed up the stairs back to my room.
I opened the door and sprawled back on my bed covering myself with the warm soft blanket.
~*~
*ring*
*ring*
*ring*
I woke up yet again. This time to the sound of the phone. I picked up the phone that was beside the alarm clock.
“..hello?” I asked with a sleepy voice.
“Hey!” The other voice answered back. It was none other than Chester’s. “how you been?”
My eyes shot open to the sound of his voice.
“I’ve been better” I said trying to sound enthusiastic.
“Oh... anything bad happen?” I didn’t want to tell him. For if I did, I would start crying on the spot.
“Umm... no, no nothing serious” I faked a laugh.
“That’s good” he said dropping his worried voice. “...listen, so like my wife went on vacation to her parents’ house and I didn’t want to go cause you know, I don’t really like her parents, so I was wondering... do you wanna like, stay over here for the holidays or something? we could hang out like we always use to...”
He waited for me to answer. I was silent for a while.
“...Mikey?”
A little too long.
“Oh yeah sure dude, that’d be really great” I said.
“That’s great” he said. “Ok so listen, I’m going to pick you up around five... is that cool?”
I looked at the watch 3:54 pm.
“Yeah that’s cool” I answered.
“Okay good, I’ll see you then”
“See ya” with that said I placed the phone back.
I should have said I had plans. But then again, it would be nice to hang around with him again. They haven’t ‘hanged’ around with each other for quite a long time. So maybe this might turn up to be a good thing.
I packed the stuff I needed and waited for the clock to tick to five o’clock. I have almost an hour to take a nap. I rested my head back on the pillow and closed my eyes.
I ran and ran. I don’t know where I was going but my legs seem to. People passed by me as a blur. I couldn’t tell where I was. Everything was moving too fast.
I suddenly stopped and looked at the two bodies laying in front of me. I knelt down beside the woman and held her head on my lap as I looked at her face.
“..mom” I cried. I shook her stiff body hoping, believing her body would start moving again. “...mom...” I cried again. I was mad now. Not that I hated them, but how could they just leave me.
“..mom.. wake up... WAKE UP! ...please come back” I shook her harder. “mom... MOM!” I shook. “Please wake up... please wake up...” I sobbed. “...please...”
Everyone passed by not noticing me and the two dead bodies. I looked over at my dad. How could he, how could they. Tears ran down my face. I cried, I yelled.
I woke up gasping for air. I ran my hand through my ruffled up hair still panting. I could feel the tears starting to form.
I looked at the alarm clock forgetting all about Chester. 4:46 pm. He’ll be here soon. I headed to the washroom and fixed my hair. Satisfied with how my red locks looked, I grabbed my bag of clothes and headed downstairs.
I looked at the big window beside the door. Snowing. So peaceful I thought.
I put my bag down near the door and headed for the living room and sat down. I thought about what me and Chester were going to do. It was too odd. I loved the man, how will I be able to hide these feelings?
The door bell rang. I got up and headed to the door opening it and letting the snowflakes flutter in.
He had a broad smile etched across his face. His rosy cheeks were gleaming. His nerdy glasses at the tip of his nose. His hair spiked to perfection. His hands buried in his pockets. Baggy black jeans fluttering in the wind.
I held the door silently admiring his figure, not noticing the stinging cold.
“...umm Mikey?” he finally broke. I snapped out of my dream-like state as I looked back at his confused face. “you ready?”
“ uh.. yeah” I said turning around and grabbed my jacket inside the closet. I put on my shoes and picked up my bag. He waited patiently by the door not wanting to create a puddle inside the fancy house, all the while looking at the younger man.
I looked back at him, making a sign that I was ready. He snatched the bag I was holding. He always was such a gentleman. He just smiled his gorgeous smile and headed towards the car.
I locked the door and followed after him. The silver Mercedes was now fully covered in snow. I see him opening the back door, slip in my bag and head to the drivers seat. I quickly run towards the passenger door, opening it and slipping in not wanting to stall him any longer.
The car was already on as I looked out in front of me to see snow fall on the window only to be swiped away by the windshield wipers. We were silent for a while. I didn’t know how long. I just kept looking straight ahead of me thinking about my earlier dream.
“Something wrong?” he asked looking at me. I guess I was quiet for quite a long time. I was usually the one who started our conversations.
“Yeah, yeah I’m fine” I said giving him the famous Shinoda smile, although I didn’t really put too much effort in it.
“Kay cool” he said backing up the car and heading out of the white driveway. I looked at my house. It belonged to me now. This big house belonged to me now. Pain filled my heart as I looked at the sight. It was going to be a lonely December for this house. I saw the house finally disappear from my line of sight as falling snowflakes replaced it.
~*~
We entered his home with out so much as an utter. I figured by now he would know something is wrong, and he probably does know something is wrong, but he refuses to ask.
He showed me where everything was like I haven’t been here before. He finally showed me to my room. The guest room. I always use to sleep here whenever I would have my little sleepovers, usually to baby sit little baby Draven.
He ushered me to the room. He dropped the bag alongside the bed. He left to go and get dinner ready.
I positioned myself at the edge of the bed. I gazed outside the window. The snow was still cascading down. The snow looked peaceful. I dwelled on the spot for God knows how long. It gave me too much time to think.
I should have been there for them. Why didn’t I go with them. I should have gone with them. This is all my fault.
Lately I haven’t been able to control my emotions. Sometimes I would just cry out of the blue. Or I would just feel the trickle of a tear down my cheeks. This time it’s no different for I knew what I was crying about and who they were for.
I lifted my feet up and put them against my chest as I smothered my face in them. I remained in that spot until I heard a soft sigh.
I quickly shot my head up, dropping my feet to the ground and looked at the man standing by the door. Still feeling the wetness in my eyes and cheeks, I rapidly brush my sleeve against them and turned faced the other way not looking at him.
“...Mike” he said his voice rising making it sound like a question.
I didn’t look back. I simply sat there fixated on whatever it was that I was looking at. Apparently a lamp.
“...Mikey” he said again this moving towards me. I cringed as his hand made contact with my shoulder. He noticed it and pulled his hand back.
“please Mikey, just tell me what’s wrong...” I stood up and turned to face him. Trying my best form a big grin.
“Nothing, nothing’s wrong Chester... I’m fine” I said stammering. Chester was never the one to push too far. I knew that he wouldn’t buy this but he pretended that he did anyhow.
He sighed. “Okay... good” he looked pleased. “now come on, dinner’s ready” I followed him as he started walking towards his dining room.
There were to sets of plates, set opposite ends each other on the circular table. The table wasn’t big and in the middle were a pile of food.
‘Why did he cook so much?’ I thought. There really wasn’t that much, but there was enough that the both couldn’t finish.
He sat on one side as I placed my self on the other. He looked at me, waiting. I looked back. This is awkward. He smiled and started digging into the food. I pursued a moment later, wondering what that was about.
I cut my self a one of the chicken drumsticks. I loved the drumsticks. I knew I had to grab for more, else I might end up insulting Chester. I seized the salad bowl and dumped a little bit of the greens on my plate. Next I went after the pasta bowl. Chester had the same idea and I grabbed my hand back.
“Go ahead” he said pushing the bowl closer to me while smiling. Why does he have to be such a gentleman all the time.
“Thanks” I smiled back, knowing well that I was surely blushing. He kept looking at me. Maybe he was waiting for me to finish with the pasta. I didn’t put a lot on my plate because I really couldn’t finish what was on it already.
I felt his eyes still observing me. Why can’t he just pick up something else. I finished in record time and gave it to him not meeting his eyes. I picked up my fork and started eating.
The silence made the contact of fork and plate seem like it was amplified. I knew Chester was waiting for me to say something.
“...this is good” I finally said looking down at my plate. I didn’t know exactly what was good. I didn’t really notice how they tasted as I shoved them in my mouth.
“Thank you” he uttered with his mouth still a bit full. I looked at him and almost laughed at the site. He gulped down his food and gave a chuckle.
I was full, bloated, I couldn’t eat a thing anymore. I was playing around with my salad pieces when I heard his voice talk to me.
“..there’s more if you want some more” he said stating the obvious.
“Yeah I know, I’m just... full” I said still playing with the green leaf.
He put down his fork and knife on top of the plate and stood up. I stopped playing with the leaf, looked at him and did the same. I was just going to ask what he was doing as he came towards me when he placed his plate on top of mine, grabbed the both and headed to the kitchen.
I knew my silence was slowly bugging him. But I didn’t want to ruin the holidays for the both of us. I picked up the left over food and followed after the blonde. He headed back to the table picking up the rest of the stuff.
‘Maybe I should do the dishes’ I thought. I needed to do something around here. He’s been doing everything for me.
I placed the two bowls of food down on the counter and made my way to the sink of plates. I turned on the water washing the remnants of food on the plate the turned it back off. I grabbed the sponge, poured some soup, and started my washing.
He came back into the kitchen. He wrapped the leftovers as I washed the dishes, both silent.
Couples of forks, knives, plates, and cups weren’t that hard to wash. I was about to dry them off with the towel but Chester grabbed it first and started drying them himself.
He noticed my still wet hands. He grabbed them and dried them up. Focused on drying them as he would be on the plates and others. He finished and continued back to drying the plates.
I decided to put away the things in the cupboard as he was making a pile of the dried things on the side. I put the last plate inside the cupboard and closed it to reveal his crystal eyes looking at me again.
His face was emotionless. I didn’t know what he was thinking.
“What?” I asked finally breaking the moment.
“I’m trying to figure out what’s wrong with you using my psychic powers” he said looking amused.
“Is it working?”
“Nope” he said giving up and as he made his way to the living room. I stood there for a moment before deciding to retreat back to the guest room. I glanced back at the stove watch before heading out.
Almost 8:30.
Wow, did time ever fly.
“I’m gonna go catch some zee’s alright Chester?” I said walking by the living room.
“Already?” he said sounding like a little kid losing his playmate.
I smile weakly at him. “Yeah, sorry... I just kinda need to rest” He nodded and as I went back to my walking pace and entered the upstairs guest room. I close the door and move to the bed. I crawl in and enclose the blanket just above my chest.
‘Now I’m making Chester worry’ I thought. ‘stop doing this Mike, you’ll end up frustrating him and yourself in the process’ I continued. ‘if you tell him what’s been going on he can comfort you and help you... and think that your a fuckin freak’ I finished.
I closed my eyes shut waiting for sleep to take me.
~*~
The next day was no different. I was silent, therefore making him be silent as well having no one to talk to. Every time our eyes meet, I quickly avert it to something else. We uttered words to each other every now and then but they were meaningless.
As slowly as the morning left, the dark finally arrived. It wasn’t as dark as it should be outside since the snow was illuminated by the bright moon. We lived near the suburbs but not completely. There isn’t any buildings around the area, but if you drive south about 8 or 10 miles, you’ll end up at the metropolis.
I lived about 3 or 4 miles from here. I never really noticed how long the rides I take to and from Chester’s house are. I was always excited to come and sad when I leave.
I remained in a sitting position against the headboard as I looked out the window.
“I’m gonna have to tell him sooner or later” I sighed softly before lying down on the bed.
I closed my eyes as I anticipated for sleep.
~*~
I woke up with a throbbing headache. I sit still for a bit before getting up to do the regular morning routines.
I went back to my room and got out of my pyjamas and got into something more casual.
I head downstairs.
‘That’s odd’ I thought. ‘Chester would always be down here before he is doing something’
Usually Chester would be lying on the couch watching morning news with freshly brewed coffee. I headed into the living room anyways and flicked on the TV. I looked for a channel that showed news. After noon news now that I look at the time. It was almost 12. Snowing again throughout the whole day. By now the snow outside would reach my height.
I turned off the TV and decided to brew some coffee of my own. I had to figure out where the coffee was first. I opened all the cupboards and all the little nooks and crannies of the kitchen. I couldn’t find. Just as I was going to give I heard the door unlock.
It was slow. Obviously this person was trying to come in undetected. I heard the door open, followed by footsteps. I was wondering what this person was doing. I headed out of the kitchen and towards the door. He was taking off his shoes right.
He finally noticed me, horror in his eyes as I saw him shove a small bag behind his back.
He was sneering trying to hide the rectangular box behind him.
“Chester?” I asked. “what’s inside the box?”
“umm... nothing Mikey, it’s just some tools I needed... for uhhh the christmas decorations ya know?” he said determined to keep his composure.
“Oh that’s cool... do you have anything to help me get rid of this damned headache I have” that’s the most I’ve said for a long while now.
He stared at me blankly.
“Chester?” I asked again.
“Mike umm... there’s pills in the washroom cabinet” he said.
“Oh... I guess I didn’t see... I’ll go check again” I said heading towards the washroom. I didn’t really check last time. I didn’t really bother last time either.
I opened up one of its cupboards and see the bottle of Advil. That’ll do. I take out two tablets and head back to the kitchen to fetch water just as I saw Chester running to his room and slamming the door behind him.
‘What the hell is up with that guy’
I didn’t do anything all day. And Chester, well Chester hasn’t left his room for almost 3 hours now. I would go ask him what was going on but I’d just end up bothering the guy.
I bring my knees up to my body as I sat on the couch. Was it cold in here or was it just me? I hugged my knees as I flicked through the channels. Nothing to watch. A bunch of stupid American cartoons. I sighed.
I finally stopped at another news channel. There’s nothing else to watch so I might as well watch what’s going on around the world or something.
I saw houses filled with Christmas decorations and a reporter lady inside a giant mall showcasing all the pretty colours and lights. I just remembered that Christmas is in a week. I smacked myself forgetting all about Christmas. I mean this is why I’m here after all, to spend Christmas with Chester. Then it hit me again. I had to get a gift for Chester.
“Fuck!” I whispered to myself. But what am I going to get him? What will he want. Thoughts ran through my head. I really have no idea what this man wants.
I should be glad I don’t have to get the other presents for other people. Well at least not yet.
I needed to think about this. And I knew the best place for doing so. I went to my room and got dressed to go outside. There was this little hill not to far from here where it overlooks the lake.
I loved coming here, winter, spring, summer or fall. Chester would always find me here if he didn’t find me anywhere else. I swept away the snow and sat on the only bench that was there. My ass is cold. I pushed that thought aside and thought about what I was going to get Chester.
Another thought popped into my head. How will I go buy the gift? Public transportation is crap and I doubt could barely get around and I couldn’t really ask Chester to come with me.
“I’ll just borrow his car then” I whispered to myself letting my hot breath turn into frosty smoke.
A gaming system. That’s a great idea. He’s never really played any games. Even when we’re on our tour bus Chester never got the chance to play. Joe, Phi, or Rob would be hogging it all the time. It’s the perfect idea.
I went back to the house. Chester still hasn’t come out of his room. What’s wrong with him.
I ultimately decided to go and knock on Chester’s door at last. No one answered. I opened the door slightly and peered in to see Chester with his head buried into the pillow.
“Chester?” I called softly. His head tilted up and anger flared in his eyes.
“Don’t you knock?” he said looking at me straight in the eyes as he got up into a sitting position.
“I knocked but you didn’t-”
“What do you want Mike?” he said cutting me off. His tone of voice hurt me.
“Umm... I was just wondering if I could maybe borrow your car?” I asked a little frightened of him. He looked at me and pointed where his keys were laying. They were on top of his drawer. He made no move to try and get it.
I walked in slowly and made my way to where he was pointing. What just happened? He hates me all of a sudden. Well I can’t really blame him, I have been a silent dumbass the last few days.
I grab his keys and look at him to see him glaring back at me. Why is he so mad at me?
I gave him a slight smile but didn’t get one in return. I poised my head down and headed to the door.
“Thanks” I managed before slipping out and shutting the door behind me. I let out a sigh and head on out.
Chester’s angered face was all that was plastered in my mind. I stripped the thought as I parked his car inside so as not to let it collect snow. I put on my shades and went to look for an electronic store. Or whichever stores sell the system I need.
“I’m pretty sure Wal-Mart has electronics” I headed in and looked for the electronics section. I beamed a smile finally finding the damned spot.
“Gamecube, Plasystation 2, or Xbox” I muttered to myself. “Inni minni minee mo. Pick a tiger by the toe- oh fuck it I’ll just get him an Xbox”
I went up to one of the employees and asked for one.
“Has anyone ever told you that you look a lot like Mike Shinoda from Linkin Park?” the blonde girl said surveying me.
Fuck. My body began to sweat.
“Yes I have been told that before, but I’m obviously not him right?” I said trying to hide my nervousness.
“Yeah, you’re right. The real Mike is a whole lot cuter” she said swiping her hair and heading to where I was earlier.
That whore. She...ugh! I simply followed, took the damned thing and a few games from her hands and went to pay for it.
I carried the bag around not really wanting to go back to a frustrated Chester. This mall had nothing interesting. After 3o minutes of mindless walking I finally headed back into the car and drove back to Chester’s home.
“Stupid snow” I groaned. The snow was still falling. Just as they built up, they were swiftly swiped away by the wipers.
I was in the highway now. I sighed, finally out of the busy streets of the city. I turned on the radio as I cruised down the snowy highway.
“Fuck!” I cursed. The snow got thicker and fatter now. I squinted my eyes to see ahead of me. I turned the little wipers on faster and slowed my speed down. There was only two lanes now. The right ones for the slows and left one for the fast. Of course I would stick to the right.
Just as the pack of snow got swiped away a red car appeared right in front of me.
“WHAT THE FUCK!” I shrieked.
I pushed hard on the brake pedal. The car didn’t brake fast enough. The snow wasn’t helping at all. It just let the car slide.
Chester’s silver Mercedes rammed right at the back of the red car.
Chapter 2 - Take back all the things I said to you
“Get up...” I pulled my head out of the white cushion in front of me. The man was shaking me from the broken side window. The man was holding a cell phone.
“Good you’re awake” the man smiled. “now try and push open the door alright, I couldn’t do it cause of the glass shards... so you’re going to have to”
He stepped away from the door. I pulled on the handle and struggled with the door. I pulled my right arm to assist the left. Just as I was lifting it, pain shot through. I yelped at the pain. I look at my bruised right arm. Something sharp cut through my jacket sleeve and pierced a line down my arm. I felt more pain at the right side of my ribs. I look down as blood was dripping down. There was a chunk of glass. I pulled it off using my left arm yelling at the pain. I looked at the bloodied glass as I threw it away.
I used my left hand and pushed hard on the door until it finally swung open. I tried to get out but with no luck. The man came by my side and ushered my hand over his shoulder. I complied and got up. The pain was excruciating. I turned us around as I looked at the damaged car. Chester was going to kill me. I look at the red car in front of me as I notice another man leaning against it with a cell phone to his ear. That must have been the driver. Well at least he’s okay. I finally look at the man who I had my hand left hand wrapped around to. The man was probably in his mid 40’s.
“Thank you” I sighed.
“Are you okay?” was what I got back.
I nodded.
“Could you stand?” he asked. I let go of his shoulder as I managed to stand.
“Yeah” I answered back “thanks”
“Good, well I talked to the police, they’re coming now and so are the tow trucks” he said heading back to his car. I nodded in appreciation as the man left. The man sure was happy to get out of this situation.
Despite the pain, I regained feeling of the cold. It was getting dark and it was getting even colder. Snow still fell freely from the sky. I stood at the side of the road waiting for the police.
The police arrived a short time later and asked me a bunch of questions. They asked if I needed to go to a hospital. I shook my head as I folded my arms and let snow cover up the bruised areas. The man must have been blind. Snow doesn’t turn red. I was thankful for a stupid cop and that I didn’t have to go to a damned hospital. I needed to explain all this to Chester.
Since I had no ride back, the police drove me back. I stopped before getting into the car. I went back to the wreckage, pulled out a plastic bag and limped back to the police car.
The sun has gone out when we finally arrived in front of Chester’s house. The police left me by the doorway. I turned around and pushed on the doorbell. No answer. I push again. Still no answer. It’s freezing out here.
I hugged myself, now fully aware of how cold it was. The cold made my whole body numb so I didn’t have to feel too much of the pain. A pair of lights shone past me. Someone pulled up to the driveway. The car died and Chester came out. He had two cars? He runs up to me.
“Mike! You stupid fuck! You destroyed my car!” I felt a pang in my heart. He cared more about the car than my well-being.
“Chester I can explain... please...” I pleaded smoke escaping my mouth. He opened the door. He entered, I followed holding the bag and dropping it to my side as I was welcomed by the warm heat.
He took off his jacket and I stood there his back to me. “Chester... I’m sorry I didn’t mean to wreck your car” I said trying to walk towards him but was stopped by the shock of pain. I moved my left hand over to my bruised ribs hoping it would cease its attack on me.
“Well you did...” he said frustration in his voice. “fuck Mike... you know it’s fucking snowing outside and what do you do? you drive like it’s a fresh summer day”
He turned around and looked at me.
“I’m sorry” I said my head bowed. I had tears in my eyes. I can feel them storm down my face. I lost another person.
I can feel the stinging pain on the rightt sides of my body. I can feel every bit of physical pain, and now it’s mixed in with the emotional.
“Mikey...” he said a lot more softly. He motioned towards me.
I stopped him from getting closer to me.
“You’re right” I stammered. “I guess I was being a stupid fuck... I just... I’m sorry” I said still focused on the ground.
I moved past him and started limping my way up the stairs. He hated me now. He hates me...
I open the door to the room. I can still feel the blood trickle down my body. I felt a little dizzy until I suddenly fell to the floor.
“You’re a loner” said Brad’s mocking voice.
“Yeah Mikey... you’re all alone... no more mommy or daddy to help you” Rob said in a baby voice.
“Move on with your life you stupid pussy” Joe said giving a snort.
“Yeah you dumb fag... get out of our band, we don’t need a faggot like you” Phoenix spat out.
“That’s why your stupid parents left you, they think that death is a whole lot better than the life they had with you” Anna laughed.
“No!” I cried “that’s not true. They loved me. They loved me...”
They all laughed in unison.
I was in the centre. They all surrounded me, mocking, pointing, and laughing at me.
“Chester?” I cried out. There was no answer. Just laughing. I tried to cover my ears. But they were still as clear as a bell. “...help me”
“Chester? Where are you? please... don’t leave me” I covered my ears harder and knelt down. I was spinning. Everyone’s faces were spinning past me. Then I was engulfed by the darkness.
I woke up gasping for air. The pain surged through my body and I fell back down on the bed. I placed my hand to where the pain was emitting from. There were bandages there. I look down at my half covered body. My right arm was covered with white bandages and the whole top part of my body was as well. I slowly pulled my body back up to a sitting position.
I looked around. N0thing but an empty room. I was disappointed that the blonde wasn’t there. I slowly pulled my legs out of the bed as I felt the cold pinch at my legs. I was glad that I was at least wearing boxers.
I got up and looked for pants and shirt to wear.
I put them on and started limping my way towards the door. I popped open the door and slid on out. No one was around.
“Chester?” I called out. No answer. I head down the stairs finally getting to the living room. I see him sitting on the couch focused on something.
“Chester..?” I said in a more calm voice. He was either ignoring me or he really was zoned out.
I move closer to him.
“Chester... can you hear me?”
“Of course I can hear... I’m not deaf you dumb fuck” he scolded as I tried to find the irony in his voice but with no luck.
I manage a slight chuckle and stopped the moment he turned his head to stare at me.
“I... I’m really very sorry about last night” I said looking at him. His face was blank. He was obviously trying to hold in his anger. I bowed my head down avoiding his stony gaze.
A few seconds have past and I still haven’t gotten an answer from him. I look back at him to see his eyes directed back to whatever it is he was looking at before.
“We...we could use the money that I still have and buy you a new one” I said rather optimistically. “and... you’ll have an all new Mercedes” I said flailing my hands.
I bit my lip. Why won’t he answer fuck damn it!
“We could buy two if I have enough money” I chuckled. “one could be for you and one can be for Sam”
I dropped my fake smile and felt the pang of pain ripple through my body as I said those words. I didn’t know what to do.
“...Chester... please... by the gods please say something” I sniffled.
I cried silently as he gave no answer. He hates me now. Why do I ruin everyones lives.
I gained composure of my body and started heading back to the guest room. I needed to get out. My emotions are overtaking me. I grab my jacket while sniffling, put on my boots and blundered out of the house.
Tears abandoned my eyes and fell free escaping the prison. I staggered slowly away not knowing exactly where I was going.
He hates me... everyone hates me... why am I such a bother to everyone
“So he lost a car... he can’t even forgive me for that” I sobbed. “it’s just a god damned car” I snivelled wiping my tears.
I sit on the bench overlooking the lake finally realising where my legs took me off to. I sobbed even harder now.
I don’t know how much time has passed but it felt like my tears remained frozen on my cheeks. I have no intention on heading back. I’ll just stay out here and freeze. It’s not like anyone’s going to care. I’m just a lonely little faggot bastard.
I sigh as all the tears in me were drained out.
“...Mike” I heard Chester whisper from behind me. How did he sneak up on me so silently. I didn’t bother to turn my head. I pretended like he wasn’t there. Let’s see how he likes being ignored.
He sat next to me.
“..if you stay here any longer, you’ll catch hypothermia” he said.
I didn’t say anything for a second trying to keep the ‘ignore him’ thing. But it didn’t last.
“I don’t care” I whispered.
“C’mon Mike, let’s go back inside” he uttered standing up. I sat there not wanting to go back.
“Mike... get your ass up” his voice sounding harsh. But I didn’t want to go. I’ve dealt with enough pain and I’ll be damned he takes me in there and starts telling me how stupid and worthless I am.
“Don’t make me repeat myself!” his voice cold. “fuck damn it Mike!”
“Mike get the fuck up!” he yelled.
New tears replaced the old. Where did they come from? I shook my head.
“Why are you so fuckin’ difficult?” he yelled again motioning towards me. I winced at the harsh words escaping his mouth.
“...because I can’t deal with the pain anymore Chester” I said almost in a whisper. He stopped.
“You think you can’t deal with the pain?” his voice cold. “Sam fuckin’ broke up with me about day ago... how’s that for pain... huh Mike?”
“I’m sorry” I said not knowing if he heard me or not. Why did they break up?
“Now you know... now get the fuck up!” I shook my head again. He grunted in frustration. “what the fuck is wrong with you!”
“Why do you hate me? Why does everyone hate me... everyone I loved left me Chester...” I cried. “and now I’m pretty sure I lost you as well”
“What the fuck are you talking about!” he yelled.
“Anna broke up with me and my parents are DEAD!” I stood up yelling at the same tone he was on. He looked at me in shock. I tried to hold back the tears. I turned around not wanting him to see me at my weakest point.
“...Mikey” he said in the softest voice. “..I’m so sorry” he said moving in front of me. I cowered my head down only for it to be tilted back up by his hands.
He looked at me and kissed away a descending tear.
“Your not alone Mikey” he said embracing me "and you haven't lost me... you'll never lose me" He was warm. I sobbed on his shoulder abandoning the pain emitting from my wounds.
“Wanna head back inside now?” he said still hugging me aware of how cold I was.
I nodded my head as he pulled away from me. We headed back slowly. He held my hand so I could walk properly.
We got in and he walked me to the living room and sitting me down.
“I’ll get you coffee” he said not asking whether I wanted one or not.
The heat of the house slowly warmed my numb limbs. He came back with a cup of steaming coffee.
“Thank you” I sighed making a grab for the cup he was holding. My hands were shaking.
I took a sip and I notice him staring at me.
“What?” I asked.
“I... I just wanted to apologize for yelling at you earlier” he said forming a smile.
“It’s alright” I said sipping at the hot liquid again. “...I’m sorry for destroying your car”
He chuckled. “That’s alright too, it’s just a car” he said eyeing me. “would you have really bought me a car?”
I put the cup down and turned to face him.
“Yeah...I would have bought you a new car”
“You do know how expensive they are right?” he asked.
“I don’t care...” I said looking at my thumbs as i dwindled them. I felt his body shift closer to me.
I looked at him. His face was so close. He leaned in and kissed me. He licked at my lips before moving back.
I looked at him taking in what just happened.
“..C-Chest-” I was cut off by his lips crashing into mine again. He flicked his tongue out asking for entrance. I open my mouth and let him invade me. He pushed me back and I whimpered in pain.
“Sorry... sorry” he said pulling back. I smiled.
“That’s ok...” I blushed.
“So Mikey... you okay with all this?” he asked grinning.
“Y-yeah... yeah I am” suddenly feeling like a little kid talking to someone that I had a crush on.
He chuckled noticing my face flushing.
“It’s okay... I won’t bite ya” he said moving closer beside me placing his hand behind my head and leaning me in to kiss him.
“So you wanna help me decorate this place?” he asked looking around then looking back at me. “Christmas is tomorrow”
That’s right. I forgot all about Christmas.
“Sure... but I don’t know if I’ll be much help” I said blushing. He’s just so god damned hot and he feels the same way about me! How lucky am I. But why did he break up with Sam though. I decided not to ask now and keep this moment we have as it is.
“You’ll be a lot of help... trust me” he said leaning in to seize my lips. Again. Man I could do this all day.
“C’mon, let’s go get the stuff from the basement” he said standing up and offering me his hand. I took it as we walked hand in hand towards the basement.
He let go of my hand and headed towards a large box in a corner. He picked it up and started heading up the stairs. He’s so fucking strong and sexy.
“You can carry the bags... honey” I couldn’t see his face but I knew he was grinning.
I headed to the same spot he picked up the large box from and looked at the bags opening them to see what was inside. Lights and decorations on one bag. I picked it up with my left hand and the one beside it not bothering to see what was inside the other.
I headed up the stairs to see the grinning Chester. I grinned back and headed back to the living room. I dropped the bags and turned around.
“That’s it” he said carrying the a box dropping it near the larger box and the two bags. “you wanna help me set up the tree first?”
I nodded and shuffled to the large box. It took us a lot of minutes to get the tree up but got it up nonetheless. He set up the lights around the tree while I put up the decorations on it making jokes about the little things along the way.
“Aww...” I said. “this is such a cute elf!” I held it right in front of my face taking a good look at the tiny figure.
“Yeah... it is...” he said looking over to what I was awing over. “I think you’re a lot cuter though”
He returned to putting up the lights around the tree as I blushed madly. I hung the elf, putting it on a spot where it was sure to be seen. He finished putting the lights around and plugged it in. I stepped back and stared in awe at the pretty colours. He stood behind me putting his hands on my waist while resting his chin on my shoulder.
“You like?” he asked.
“It’s really beautiful...” I whispered softly. He turned me around and kissed me. He helped me place all of the remaining decorations on. One more item was left. The star at the top of the tree. He would have given me a piggy back to get it up there but due to my stupid injury, it’s not possible without some bloody pain. He went to the basement and brought back a ladder. He let me climbed on and put the golden star on the tree. Before I got down he plugged in the star and I smiled at the bright star. When I was finally down, Chester took the ladder back to the basement.
I looked at the tree. This was going to be the first Christmas without my parents. I held back a sob as warm hands embraced me from behind again. I melted into the arms as we stood watching the colourful tree. The only things missing now were the presents. I’ll have to wrap his present later.
We didn’t bother to put up lights outside of the house. It’ll only lead to frustration. Instead we put the lights around the window still visible to the outside world.
“The guys are coming later” I heard Chester say before plugging in the chord. “that’s alright... right?”
“Yeah... Chester this is your house you know” I chuckled. Fuck! I didn’t get anything for the other guys. As though he read my thoughts he looked at me.
“You got nothing for the guys?” he said eyeing me with a smile. I looked down, put my hands behind my back and started making circles with my foot on the carpet.
“God you look so cute!” he exclaimed. “you don’t have to worry Mikey... I’ll put both our names on it alright?”
“Oh no, no, no you don’t have to do that” I said looking at him.
“It’s cool Mikey” he said moving towards me. “you just gotta help me wrap them”
He went past me and started off somewhere upstairs. I waited there till he came back, still looking at the tree.
He came back a few minutes later with bags of presents and wrapping goodies. He sat on the floor. He patted right beside him to gesture me to sit there. I gladly got up and sat beside him. He pulled out an item from one of the bags and I started laughing.
“Who’s it for?” I asked sniffling back a laugh. It was a blood red turtle neck sweater. I couldn’t picture any of us wearing something like that. I touched the fabric and I was surprised at the soft texture.
“It’s for Joe” he sneered. I laughed even harder. He held his hand behind me so as not to let me fall. “I was gonna give it to Sam but... hey she left so that’s her problem”
He didn’t seem like he was even hurt at the sound of her name. Well I guess I should be happy.
After the hard laughs and endless kissing, we finally managed to get all the presents wrapped. We cleaned up and put the presents under the tree.
“So Mikey...” he said sitting on the couch letting out an outstretched arm. I sat there and waited for him to continue. “does anyone know about... us?”
“Brad...” I said without hesitation. “he’s the only one that knows, well actually he doesn’t know that we’re actually together now, but he knows about me liking you”
“So we’re together now huh?” he said grinning.
“I’m guessing we are” I said returning him a Shinoda smile.
“I can’t resist that smile” he said seizing my lips.
“Chester... could I use the wrapping stuff?” I asked as I pulled away remembering that I still needed to wrap his Xbox.
“But who am I suppose to make love to while your gone?” he joked. “the couch?”
“You’ll have to wait till later” I winked as I got up and grabbed the bag of wraps. “umm... Chester?”
“Yeah?”
“The night of the accident... did you open up the bag?” I asked biting my lip.
“I was guessing that it was my present, so... no I didn’t open it up” he smiled.
*Phew*
“Ok good” I let out a sigh. “and don’t think about coming into the room”
“You can trust me... right?” he said as I went about my way.
“Sometimes...” I answered back sneering.
I wrapped the system and the games individually. I really hope he would like this. I sighed. I put the ribbon on top of the large box and another on the slightly smaller one.
“To Chester.. I love you and I hope you that you like this present.” I scribbled. “Love Mike” I smiled. I never thought I’d be able to say that without him ever feeling the same way. But he does. I felt the warm fuzzy feeling in my stomach again.
I got up, picked up the two wrapped presents and headed back downstairs. He was sleeping when I got down there. He looked so adorable. I placed the presents under the tree. I noticed that the pile got a bit larger.
I sat on the floor beside the couch and looked at his sleeping figure. His face is so finely defined. His nerdy glasses looked so cute on him. His spiked bleach blonde hair sticking out. I placed my head on the edge of the couch, my left hand under my chin, as I watch him still fixated at his beautiful face proportions. I traced a finger along his hands under his head, then up along his jaw line. He opened his eyes slightly.
“I-I’m sorry” I apologized. “I didn’t mean to wake you”
“It’s alright Mikey” he said his eyes focused on mine. “come here” he patted moving over.
I got up and moved to lay beside him my back turned to him. He put an arm over me, cuddling closer to me. He placed his head behind my neck. I could feel every breathe he made. He kissed at my neck and I slightly giggled.
“I love you” he whispered nuzzling my neck.
“I love you too” I whispered back holding his hand. I couldn’t help but think about my parents. I always spent Christmas with them. I dropped the thought as Chester’s soothing breath at the back of my neck finally dozed me off to sleep.
Chapter 3 - This is My December
We awoke to the sound of the loud phone. Chester got up and ran for the phone.
“..hello?” I could barely hear what he was saying. I closed my eyes and tried to get back to sleep. The warmth was gone. I sat up and looked at the watch hanging above the TV.
Almost 6.
“...No! I don’t want you back Sam. It’s over between us!” I heard him yell. He sounded as if he wanted to rip out the woman’s head. “stay there with your parents and don’t come back here”
Silence.
“...this is my fuckin house Sam. Nothing here belongs to you. NOTHING!” he yelled again as he put the phone down rather loudly.
He came back running his hands through his locks. I sat there not knowing what to do. Chester was upset and I never really knew how to fix it. He was always happy-going when we’re together.
He sat beside me. I sat there quietly.
“Sorry you had to hear that Mike” he sat slouching over the couch.
“S’ok” I whispered.
“Mike don’t get freaked out, she just... makes me so mad sometimes” he said balling his hands into a fist. I took his hands into mine as they slowly unclenched.
“I’m not freaking out and I understand you and Sam still have some things to work out, so I’ll give you guys time to do the stuff you have to do” I said still keeping a firm hold on his hand.
The phone rang again.
“I’ll answer it” I stood up before he did.
I noticed as I was picking up the phone the little piece of crack on the receiver.
“Hello?”
“Hey Mike!” Joe practically yelled.
“’sup Joe?” I asked keeping the phone a fair distance from my ear.
“Well I called the guys and asked them what time we were suppose to get there, they didn’t know so I was designated to call and ask...” he said. “...so what time do you guys what us there?”
“umm.. hold on let me ask Chester” I said.
“Alright man”
“Chaz” I half yelled at him. “when do you want them to be here?”
“Who’s them?” he answered back.
“The guy’s you nut hole” slightly chuckling. Nut hole. I’m such a dork.
“Whenever they want!”
I put the phone back to my ear to hear a humming Joe.
“You guys can come here whenever you want”
“K cool I’ll tell the guys” he said.
“So how was your trip with Brad?” I asked
“Dude it was the best!” he started. “I knew it was going to be a hell lot of fun the moment we got out of the car and Brad already flipped on the snow”
We both laughed. We went on for awhile making fun of Brad till he had to go.
I went back to the living room to see Chester sitting on the smaller couch looking out the window.
“..Chester?” I said moving towards him. Sam must be bothering his beautiful mind. “don’t worry about Sam”
“It’s not really Sam I’m worrying about” he uttered. I almost didn’t hear him. I moved closer. “it’s Draven, I miss him and what if she never lets me see him again?”
“She will don’t worry” I comforted. “she can’t keep him from you forever, she knows that Draven needs a dad”
“She’s probably going to marry some other person and that’ll be the dad” he said.
“Don’t worry Chaz, we’ll find a way so that you can see Draven just as much as she does” I was going to find out a way to do that, somehow. I knew how much he loved Draven.
“Thanks Mike” he sighed. I smiled a weak smile.
“Are the divorce papers finalized?” I asked.
“I think so, I’m leaving that to my divorce attorney, I already signed the crap” he said letting out another sigh. I couldn’t help but feel like crap right now. When he’s feeling like shit, I feel like shit.
He looked at me noticing the faint sadness in my eyes.
“So when are the guys coming” he said easily slipping the downcast face he had.
“Umm.. I don’t really know... they might be here soon” I said rubbing the back of my head. How can he just be sad and be so cheery the next moment.
“Let’s order pizza” he exclaimed getting up from the seat. “..unless you wanna cook”
“We’ll just order the pizza” I babbled.
We ordered the pizza thinking that 4 boxes should cover us all. I placed the plates around the table. They’ll probably end up travelling towards the couch. I gathered back all the plates and placed them in a pile instead placing the forks and knives beside them. What will they be used for? we don’t eat pizzas with those. I picked them up and placed them back in the drawer. The delivery dude came about 15 minutes late. I could understand why. The weather seems to be getting worse outside. I gave him the money and tip. He nodded off as I smiled and closed the door.
“Chester!” I yelled. My left hand wasn’t that strong and if he didn’t come running to grab the boxes, we would have had pizza on the floor. We placed the pizzas on the table.
“Chaz I’m gonna go take a shower” I told him. I wasn’t sure if he heard me or not but I started up the stairs anyway.
I turned on the water and stripped myself of my clothing. I unwrapped the bandages showing healing scars. I’m glad Chester wasn’t showering with me else he would see this horrid thing. I stepped into the shower and let the warm water wash over me.
Being inside there for around ten minutes gave me way too much time to think. I got out and dried the excess water then finishing off by wrapping the towel around my waist.
I opened the cupboards and drawers looking for the bandages he used to wrap me with. Finally finding it, I wrapped it around my body and right arm. I left the washroom and headed to the guest room. I dropped the towel around my waist to expose my whole body to the shivering cold. I quickly searched for clean boxers in one of the drawers and slipped the nice fabric on. I looked for pants and shirt and slipped those on too.
I went back to the washroom, found Chester’s gel and added some to my hair letting the red locks spike.
I headed back to find Chester watching TV. He looked at me.
“You took a shower without me!” he puppy eyed.
“I’m sorry... I told you.. but I guess you didn’t hear” I said sitting beside him.
“Mmm... you smell nice” he said sniffing me. He nipped at my neck making me chuckle at the feeling. “I think I need shower too”
He got up and headed to the washroom.
The doorbell rang. Again. Then again. These people are very impatient. Maybe I should just let them freeze out there for a while longer. The bell rang continuously this time. So annoying. I opened the door to see both Joe and Brad gritting their teeth. They flew in and dropped the bags they were holding.
“Hey guys!”
“F-fuck!” Brad chattered. “I-t’s ssso ddaammnn c-cold out tthere”
I looked over at Joe who seemed to be in the same state. I smiled at both of them. I grabbed their coats and put them in the closet. They took of their shoes and dusted off the remaining snow on them and headed to the living room with their bag filled presents.
“You guys want coffee?” I didn’t need to ask. They nodded in response.
I went to the kitchen to see the smoking coffee, cups, sugar coffee whitener and milk all ready to be served. I grabbed two cups and poured the coffee and other contents into it.
I went back and handed them their coffees. I smiled at them as they sipped at their coffee.
“Thanks” Joe smiled. Brad nodded in appreciation.
“No problem” I grinned sitting on the smaller couch beside the window.
Brad looked at my arm noticing the bandages. Damn! I should have worn a sweater.
“Mike what the fuck happened to your arm” he put the cup of coffee down and moved towards me.
“It’s nothing I... It’s just... nothing” I smiled putting my hand behind my back.
“Mike!” I knew he wasn’t going to drop this until he got the real answer. I placed my hand on my lap in defeat.
I told Brad to sit down as I told the whole story.
“...and the next morning I had bandages all over me” I finished as Chester walked in.
“’Sup you guys!” he smiled. “glad you could make it”
“Hey Chester!” they both said in unison then averted their gaze back at me. Chester moved towards me as I stood up. He sat down pulling me down with him to sit on his lap.
The two gaped at us.
“..guys” Joe started his mouth hanging wide open. Brad fixed his face so that now he had a broad smile on.
I leaned my head back letting him nip at my neck. Joe blinked not believing what he’s seeing.
“W- what’s going on?” he stammered looking at us then to Brad and then back to us. I held Chester’s hand as I began to explain to Joe.
Eventually Joe finally had a smile across his face.
“Dude!” he half shouted. “that is so cool and weird at the same time!”
I blushed as Chester squeezed my hand tighter.
“Brad take that grin off your face else it will stay that way” Chester joked.
“I... I can’t” he shook his head. “I’m just so happy for you guys”
Brad was really happy. He knew that now he doesn’t have to worry about me and that Chester will make it all better for me.
“Thanks Brad” I whispered.
Just as Joe was about to say something the doorbell rang. I got up and headed towards the door.
I opened the door for Phoenix and Rob to come in. Phoenix dove at me with a bear hug.
I yelped in pain.
“PHOENIX!” I yelled. He backed away confused.
“Wha.. what’s wrong?” he said confused.
“I just had a little accident and I can’t really deal with hugs right now” I smiled. I hope he didn’t take the yelling part to harshly but I was in a lot of pain. Chester came up behind me.
“What’s the matter?” he said nodding a hello to Dave and Rob.
“No nothing Chaz...” Rob said. “Phe here decided to give our Mikey a hug and... yeah..”
“It’s ok Phe... I’m fine” I smiled at him getting one in return. Chester took their bags and headed away to the living room. I took their jackets and placed it in the closet.
We headed into the living room as Joe was jumping around swaying his hands. Probably talking about the ski trip.
I turned around to face Dave and Rob.
“You guys want anything? coffee, pop?” I asked.
“Coffee would be awesome” Phe said looking at Joe. “what the hells Joe doing?”
“Probably talking about his ski trip with Brad... Rob anything I can get you?”
Rob shook his head smiling. “No thanks Mikey dude”
“Kay” I said moving away from the two and into the kitchen.
I mixed the coffee making sure to add more sugar. Phoenix always loved it that way. I headed into the living room to have all the heads to turn to look at me. All smiling.
“What?” I asked smiling. “stop looking at me like that you guys...”
I motioned to Phoenix and gave him his Coffee. I notice Chester sitting on the carpet his legs outstretched. I looked at him hoping for an answer.
“I told them about us” he finally said. I laughed and went to sit in between his spread out legs.
“Oh my God your not lying!” Rob gasped. “that’s so fucking hot.. I mean cool... cool yeah I meant to say cool” Rob rubbed his temples and ran his hands through his head. Everyone started laughing.
I got up deciding that the table wasn’t the best place to put the pizza boxes. I grabbed 2 boxes of pizzas and placed them on the coffee table.
“Eat up you guys” I said returning back to my spot between Chester. He placed his arms around my waist and hugged me closer kissing my cheek, neck or any exposed skin he could find.
“So what’s going to happen to the band now?” Brad asked.
“Well we obviously can’t tell the world... will we?” Joe said taking a bite out of his pizza.
"Nah... I don't think we should" Chester answered.
“So does this mean we’re going to have like... gay angst songs now?” laughed Phe.
“Whoever said they weren’t already” I said joining the rest in laughter.
“We’re going to be singing about how Chaz wants to get under Mikes pants” Rob joked.
"If I was the one writing the lyrics, I would have been writing about how much I wanna get under yours Dave" Brad said winking at Phoenix.
"Yeah right Braddles" Phe laughed "man, you wish!.. the only person that I want is Robbie!"
"Sorry man I'm taken..isn't that right Joe?" Rob said tilting his head to Joe.
Joe looked at him, pizza in his mouth and confusion written all over his face. Everyone blurted out laughing.
"I don't know Rob... he's always carrying Froggie around" Chester laughed.
"Hey... what about Mr.Froggie?" Joe asked pouting.
"Well on one of our tours, Rob stole Mr.Froggie..." Chester said.
"and RAPED HIM!" Dave yelled out as he laughed on the floor. The look on Joe's face made everyone join in with Dave.
Joe jumped Rob on the floor straddling his hips holding his hands to his sides as he looked down at him.
"If you're not joking I will have to tickle attack you till you die" Joe said sneering.
Getting no answer from Rob, Joe went on tickling at the sides of Rob's stomach.. his weakest spots. Rob tried to fight him off while laughing but Joe had him pinned.
"I...Im joookk-hahaha-kiiinngg..." Rob said laughing. Joe got off satisfied with his answer. Everyone was looking at the two while still laughing.
We joked around and talked about non important things throughout the night. I didn’t eat much and neither did Chester. The guys ate most of the pizza up. Joe almost choked thinking that maybe he could handle 3 slices in his mouth.
It ultimately came close to the midnight countdown. We watched the TV countdown from a minute. Chester squeezed me in his embrace but not hard enough to inflict any pain. We were all watching intently.
“10” we all said in unison.
“9... 8... 7... 6... 5... 4... 3... 2...”
“1!” we all shouted. The guys jumped around cheering, hugging and shrieking happy new year at one another.
Chester turned me around and seized my lips. We stayed locked on until he pulled back.
“Happy new year Mikey” he smiled.
“Happy new year Chazzy” I smiled back.
“Alright you sappy ladies... we gotta open the presents now” We stared at Phoenix to see him sneering. We looked back at each other and stood up to join the others.
We opened our presents anxious to see what was inside. Joe rolled on the floor laughing convulsively holding a red sweater. We all joined along laughing at the site.
“Umm... thanks you guys...” he laughed.
“Awesome!” I heard Chester yell. We all looked at what he was so exuberant over. It was the Xbox. I blushed and bit my lip. “Mike I love you...”
“You’re welcome Chaz..” I giggled.
“Here Mikey this one’s for you” Brad said moving the box towards me then diving back to look for another present for him.
I took the small card on top of the lovely box and read. To My Mikey, From your Chazzy Chaz. I couldn’t help but giggle again.
I unwrapped the large box madly eager to find out what was inside. I stopped and looked at the package. It was a telescope. I always wanted one but I never really thought about buying one due to their expensive prices.
I loved looking at the stars. They always seem to calm me down or sooth me.
I tear streaked down my face. I was remembering the day me and Anna broke up. That was the day my whole world practically collapsed.
I felt a warm hand suddenly touch my shoulder.
“I really hope you like it Mikey” Chester whispered. All the guys around us were busy laughing and unwrapping to notice what was going on with the two of us. “I bought it cause I would always see you looking up at the stars at night... fixated on them”
I turned around and hugged him. “I love it... thank you”
“Do you like my present?” I asked.
“Mikey I love your present... Now I don’t have to worry about one of the guys hogging it”
The rest of the guys sat tiredly on the couch their presents around them. I smiled at the sight.
“You guys can stay here for the night if you guys want” Chester suggested.
“Really? you wouldn’t mind?” asked Joe. “cause that’ll be so cool, I might end up sleeping in the middle of the way back”
Everyone else nodded in agreement.
“Nah we wouldn’t mind” Chester said. He said we. Me and Him. Him and Me. I feel so fuzzy right now. “a couple of you guys can stay in the guest room and a couple could stay out here”
“You can move into my bedroom k” Chester whispered to me.
“I got the room” Joe exclaimed.
“Me too!” Rob practically yelled.
“I’ll get blankets for Brad and Phe” He stood up. “you can move your things in my room k Mikey?”
I nodded and stood up.
Phe already had his head lolled back on the couch.
I headed up the stairs and started moving my things in Chester’s room. Rob and Joe helped the process.
Once that was done I went back downstairs to see a snoring Phoenix on the couch and Brad getting ready to sleep on the floor with a blanket sprawled under him.
“I’m glad you guys hit it ff Mikey” Brad whispered to me tiredness in his voice.
“I’m really glad too” I said kneeling down beside him.
“You guys make a really cute couple” Brad grinned.
I punched him playfully as we both laughed.
“Mikey?” I stood up to look at Chester. “c’mon let’s get some rest”
I looked back down at Brad who winked. I smiled and headed upstairs with Chester hand in hand.
We passed the guest room to see Joe with his whole body almost hogging the large bed. Rob was close to falling off the edge.
We chuckled at the duo before heading into Chester’s bedroom. He closed the door and jumped onto the bed. He outstretched his full body onto the bed. I sat on the edge before resting my head under his arms.
“The party was a lot of fun” I chuckled.
“Yeah it was wasn’t it” he laughed.
“Takes some things off my mind” I whispered not knowing if he heard me or not.
“I’m really glad you enjoyed Mikey boy” he said running trails down my back with his hand.
I giggled at the ticklish feeling. “I loved it... and I love your present”
We lay there treasuring the moment we had. Our first night together.
“Mikey” he whispered.
“Yeah?” I answered back.
“Can I give you your other present?” he asked.
I raised an eyebrow.
“...and what’s the other present?”
He rolled over to face me. I looked back at him as he grabbed the back of my head and abducted my lips with his. He rolled on top of me making sure he doesn’t smother me under his weight.
He kisses me slowly, lovingly. I let him direct me to every move. Every flicker of our tongues touching was electrifying. We let ourselves ravage the other, exploring and memorizing every inch of the other mans mouth.
He pulled at my shirt, jerking it up slowly. I understood as he pulled away from the kiss. I moan at the loss. He pulls my shirt over my head slowly exposing my skin and bandages. I suddenly look embarrassed. He threw the shirt aside and pulled my chin up.
“Hey... it’s ok. Your still as beautiful with bandages on” he said kissing me. I smiled and yanked off his shirt. We went back to the duel, lazily making each others mouth sore.
I unbuckled his belt and tugged at it. He chuckled getting the idea I was getting at. He pulled his baggy black pants off to manifest his boxers. I bit my lip as I gazed at the bulge. He noticed me staring and I quickly felt my cheeks redden as I looked away. He chuckled again as he noticed my flushing face.
“Man... your just too cute Shinoda” he said pecking at my lips before ravaging it again. I smiled into the kiss.
He unbuckled my pants also as he pulled it down, moving his body down, nibbling on my collar bone along the way. I arched my back at the feel. I kicked away my pants just as he came back deprive me of air. He bucked his hips into mine. I moaned at the feeling.
I bent my head down pulling down his boxers as he nibbled at the back of my neck. I used my feet to lower it where my hands couldn’t reach. Then I placed my head back where our lips could crash into each other again. He kicked off the boxers he was wearing and started removing mine. He withdrew from my mouth licking my lips in the process. He smiled and stuck out his tongue licked his way down creating a slick path down towards my boxers.
He hooked his forefingers at the strap of my boxers and pulled it down gradually while kissing the swelling pain inside it. He extracted the boxers off of me and scented me before engulfing me in his hot mouth. He swayed his tongue as he swallowed me in and out painfully slowly. I bucked my hips but he held me down with his hands.
“Easy tiger” he purred.
“Stop teasing me” I growled. He chuckled.
He went down and licked at my two orbs taking each one in his mouth. He licked up my aching cock kissing the tip of the head. I could feel his breath on me. He blew at my cock and then slithered back to my lips.
“I’m cold Chaz” I whispered.
He pulled the soft blanket over us.
“Mike..?” he asked moving away from the kiss.
“Yeah?”
“Would you mind if I... umm.. you know...” he said lolling his eyes around.
I knew what he was trying to say. I’ll make it easier for him.
“Chaz..” I whispered getting his attention. “will you make love to me?”
That sounded so corny.
He smiled rolled over and opened the bedside drawer. He pulled out a small bottle. He straddled my legs as he prepared his hands. He placed the bottle aside and kissed my chest. He licked at my left nipple while he slowly inserted a finger inside of me. I moaned arching my back the pleasure.
“Chazz” I moaned.
He inserted another finger slowly letting my body adjust to the feel. He implanted another finger stretching me, trying not to make me feel any of the pain. He removed his fingers, I groaned at the loss of warmth inside me. He kissed me as he took hold of the bottle pouring some more of its contents into his palm. He massaged it on his hard cock, closing the bottle and throwing it aside. He pulled the blankets over us.
“Relax okay?” he murmured. I nodded and positioned my legs around him.
He smothered my lips again as he entered me slowly. I whimpered at the invading burning feel.
“Shhh...” he whispered in my ear.
He moved again, inching his way in me. The pain was burning my insides. But at the same time I wanted this, I wanted it to burn me some more. He was fully inside me now. He looked at me. We stared into each others eyes as I adapted to the pain slowly growing into pleasure.
“Chester... move!” I grunted feeling the pleasure.
He quickly complied as he moved out slowly and back in. He snagged my mouth again letting our tongues contend at the other as he moved in me, making love to me slowly. His weight is pinching at my bruises but I soon zoned it out replacing the feeling with what Chester was offering me. He knew that if he decided to take this love making of ours roughly, I would surely scream in pain.
He pulled away from our long kiss and stared at me. He was close to coming. I grabbed at my aching member and started stroking it. He smiled at me.
“You look so hot right now” Chester whispered.
“So do you..” I whispered back.
I was close.
Very close.
I closed my eyes as jets of my hot liquid poured over our stomachs.
“God Miiike!” he said coming deep inside me. He moved in little bits inside me as he slithered his mouth back onto mine. He moved out of me slowly so as not to cause me pain.
I groaned at the sudden empty space.
“I love you so much” he muttered before rolling over beside me.
I moved my head on top of his chest placing a hand over his stomach.
“I love you too Chazzums” I softly said.
"Chazzums?"
"Yeah... I think it's cute because it suits you" I smiled under closed eyelids.
"So that means I get to call you Noda bear" he chuckled.
"Hmm? Noda bear?... ok so how does that fit me?" I asked forming a smile.
"It suits you very well cause your just so soft and cuddly"
I laughed. We were silent for a while.
"Do you think the public will ever know?" I asked.
"I hope not... anyways lets not think about that now.. let's go to sleep Noda Bear" he said placing his hands over me as a protective sheild.
"Alrighty Chazzums.." I whispered closing my eyes.
For once in the entire month I felt at peace and protected here with Chester. He made the troubles and all the agonizing pain go away. I smiled as the warm blanket around us and Chester's rythmic breathing soothed me to sleep.
The End